Those Nights
by piper maru duchovny
Summary: We'd stay up late and we'd talk all night in a dark room lit by the tv light, through all the hard times in my life, those nights kept me alive. -skillet. Marsan Post-Ep for Let The Games Begin
1. Those Nights

**Those Nights**

**Summary: We'd stay up late and we'd talk all night, in the dark room lit by the TV light, through all the hard times in my life, those nights kept me alive. -skillet. **

**A/N: So I watched the Marsan clips from 'Let The Games Begin' and then turned on Skillet and this just kind of poured out. **

**Dedication: My Beef-ef Rachel. and to B. Nugent cause a few mo.s ago she said something about loving this ep and I just now wrote a post-ep for it so I hope she reads it!**

**Disclaimer: Not freakin' mine, zoom in on my eternally empty wallet!**

"You look good." Mark said as he looked at the photostrip.

"Yeah, well you go from bad, to bad, to worse. Although, the last one is slightly acceptable." Susan teased him, sipping her beer.

"You're mean." Mark laughed, "How is my chic face worse!?"

"You look like someone has stretched your face." Susan laughed, putting her drink down on a picnic table and pulling her sweater on.

"So, how do we seperate these things?" Mark asked, holding the photostrips up to the light.

"Here." Susan rolled her eyes and took the photos from him, bending it back and forth on the perforated edges. She then carefully, with a doctor's steady hand, tore them apart. She handed one strip to Mark and tucked the other safely into her purse.

"So where to now?" Mark asked, sliding the photostrip carefully into his bag.

"I have no idea." Susan laughed.

"Why don't we get a pizza and head back to my place." Mark suggested, "I recorded last weekends X-files and I still haven't watched it."

"Sure. I'll spoil the plot for you, four seconds before anything big happens." Susan laughed.

"I wouldn't expect anything less." Mark said, placing his arm around her shoulder and leading her out of the crowds that gathered on the pier, "Did you drive?"

"No." Susan shook her head.

"Well, my bike is sitting at the hospital with a flat." Mark sighed, "Do you want to walk or hail a cab?"

"Walk to the pizza place?" Susan suggested, "Take a cab from there?"

"Works for me." Mark nodded. They walked along in silence for awhile, Mark's arm around her shoulder and Susan leaning against him slightly.

"So," Susan tried to make small talk, "How's Rach?"

"She's fine." Mark smiled, "I talked to her this morning before work."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Susan asked, she loved hearing about Rachel's life.

"Like I was going to miss a prime opportunity to tease you about Tad." Mark chuckled and Susan brought her foot up and tapped his in the butt, "Hey!"

"Don't 'Hey' me!" Susan warned him, "If I have to hear about Tad one more time.. I'll.. I'll find away to get you and Doug in trouble with Weaver."

"I'm shaking in my Nikes." Mark rolled his eyes.

"Shut up." Susan glared up at him, "I'd come up with a better retort if my shoes weren't pinching a nerve that is apparently in direct correlation with my brain."

"You're the genius who wore the heels on a date.. to the pier." Mark glanced down at her feet.

"Yeah, you try being about six inches shorter than any normal guy." Susan rolled her eyes again.

"Take them off." Mark told her.

"And walk barefoot in the streets of Chicago?" Susan raised an eyebrow.

"Come on, we're like four blocks from the pizza parlor. Take them off and I'll give you a piggyback ride." Mark explained.

"Mark, you don't have-"

"Susan, just do it." Mark told her.

"Fine." Susan slid off her shoes, hooking them over two fingers, Mark bent slightly. Susan wrapped her arms around his neck and jumped, he caught her knees and pulled her up.

"You ok?" Mark asked, trying not to be preoccupied with Susan's legs in his hands.

"I'm fine." Susan said, her grip loosening around his neck and she rested her forehead against his shoulder, "You're really, really bald." Susan laughed, her breath warm against his neck.

"Yeah." Mark shifted her weight, "Keep teasing me about my lack of hair and you'll work traumas with Kerri for a month."

"Meanie." Susan pouted.

--

"I'll get the plates." Susan said as Mark flicked on the lights, pizza box in one hand.

"Sure." Mark said, walking into the living room and sitting the pizza on his coffee table, "I'm gonna change really quick."

"Okay." Susan said, letting herself into the cupboards for plates and Mark's refrigerator for more beer. She had been here so many times, she knew his apartment nearly better than her own.

"Susan?" Mark called out from behind his closed door, "You want something to change into?"

"Yes please." Susan called back, she wanted nothing more than to get lost in a pair of Mark's sweats, eat pizza and watch X-files with her best friend.

"Two seconds." Mark said and a few moments later, he came out in a pair of blue plaid pajama pants and a Bears tee-shirt, "Here." He handed her a stack of clothing.

"Thanks." Susan smiled, "Stuff is on the coffee table."

"Okay." Mark replied as she disappeared into the bathroom.

She slid off her shoes before anything else, the cabbie had demanded she put them on before she rode in his taxi. She then washed her face and pulled her short blond hair into a ponytail with the hair tie she had found in her purse. Susan looked at the clothes Mark had handed her, a pair of black sweats and a Cubs tee. She smiled. When she pulled on the sweat pants they almost immediately fell back off, so she tightened the draw string as much as she could, then rolled them down a bit. The tee-shirt went half way down her thigh and the short sleeves were past her elbows. Coming out of the bathroom, she hollered at Mark, "Okay if I grab a pair of socks?"

"Go for it." Mark called back.

"Thanks." Susan told him, she grabbed a pair of socks from his dressor and slid them on, coming back out to the living room and collapsing next to him on the couch.

"Comfortable?" Mark asked, putting a piece of pizza on her plate and handing it to her.

"Very." Susan smiled, "So, ready for some Mulder and Scully amazingness?" Susan laughed, they had gotten addicted to the show when Mark had come over to help her take care of a collicky Little Susie.

"Absolutely." Mark clicked on the TV and hit play.

"Beware, you may cry." Susan warned him.

"I do not cry." Mark told her as the creepy theme music played.

"Bull." Susan told him, "Need I remind you, Doug talks."

"Doug is going down." Mark said in a deep voice.

"Your threats are idle." Susan laughed, "You couldn't hurt a fly Mark Greene."

"You know me too well." Mark sighed, grabbing another slice of pizza and tossing the crust in the box.

"Yeah, well." Susan shrugged, giggling.

"Keep teasing." Mark grinned, "I'll just wait til you're almost asleep and slowly-" He reached over and ran a finger up her foot and Susan's leg straightened, kicking him in the chest, "OW!"

"That's why you do NOT tickle me." Susan rolled her eyes, taking her foot back.

"I'm sorry." Mark held his side.

"Didn't you learn after I almost broke your nose." Susan asked.

"I'm a guy. We have a slow learning curve."

"I've noticed." Susan grinned and Mark chucked a piece of peperroni at her, "MARK!" She screeched.

"You mocked me. No, no, you mocked MAN!" Mark said and tossed another piece at her.

"I hate you." Susan shoved him back on the couch, pinning his hands with one of hers, she traced her nails over his sides.

"Susan! Not fair!" Mark said as his chest shook with laughter.

"Not fair!? You wasted good peperroni and for that you must pay!" Susan grabbed her beer and shook it up, spraying him with it.

"You did not just do that!" Mark exclaimed.

"I think I did." Susan laughed as she looked at Mark's beer drenched face.

"Oh yeah?" Mark grabbed her beer and brought it to his lips, taking a drink, "No more for you."

"C'mon, that's not fair." Susan pouted.

"I think we need to grow up." Mark laughed handing the drink back to her.

"Probably, but where's the fun in that?" Susan asked, realizing she was still in his lap, "I'm tired."

"Yeah? Wanna crash here?" Mark asked and Susan nodded, "Okay." He muted the TV and looked at her, "Mind if we share the couch?"

"Nope." Susan shrugged, it wasn't an unusual occurence and had happened on a few occasions in their friendship.

Mark lay down on the couch, taking the inside and Susan lay down on her side next to him. Mark's arm snaked around her waist and he pulled her close, Susan's hand resting on his and pulling the afghan over them. Mark tried to pay attention to the show, but his eyes kept drifting back to Susan. She looked beautiful in the dim light as her eyes fluttered, closing fully and she snuggled against him as she drifted off. Mark tucked a blond lock behind her ear and kissed her temple, "Sleep Well Susan."

"Night Mark." She murmered in her sleep.

**A/N: Is sharing a couch too OOC? you tell me. Cause I think sharing a couch is fine. :] LOL. Anyways, I am workin' on an update for Wild At Heart and I have a one shot underway. This just sort of spilled out tonight.. well.. this morning. :]**


	2. Yours To Hold

**Yours To Hold**

**Summary: I wonder why you've been hurting, I wish I had some way to say, you're going through so much, don't you know that I could be the one to hold you. -Skillet**

**A/N: So my beef-ef Rachel took the vast majority of the Comatose c.d. and turn it into a XF fic, so I'm doing the same for ER. I thought this song fit really well, set around the time she came back from visiting little Susie/her telling Morgenstern she wanted to leave. **

**Dedication: This one goes out in memory of the best Grandma ever. I miss you :[ 5/6/98 :[ **

**but also oodles of thanks to Rach for putting me in a better mood. I lub you beef-ef**

**Disclaimer: So not mine. mk?**

"I'm gonna miss you." He hugged her tightly, they sat like that for a long time on her couch. Mark knew this couldn't be easy for her, leaving the only home she had ever known and for a little girl who held her heart. Mark had been there when Jen had taken Rachel and he should've left like Susan was leaving now.

"I hate this." Susan wiped at her tears.

"You're doing the right thing." Mark told her but his voice was betraying him.

"I know I am, it's just.. my whole life is here, but my heart isn't anymore." Susan said, drawing her knees to her chest, "When I was with Susie in Phoenix.. it made sense. I felt alive, I'd been so numb for so long."

"I know," Mark wiped her tears with his thumb, " I could see it on your face when you got back."

"You could've said something." Susan chuckled.

"Sorry?" Mark offered.

"Tonight, can we just forget that I am moving and be Mark and Susan. Eat pizza. Drink beer and watch the tail end of the Bears game?"

"That sounds like a perfect idea." Mark forced a smile.

"You dial. I'll grab the beer." Susan handed him her phone.

"Alright. But I'm getting half anchovies." Mark teased.

"You do and I'll kill you." Susan called over her shoulder as she disappeared into the kitchen.

"Why do I not think you're kidding?" Mark called back as he dialed the pizza number from memory.

"Because I'm not!"

--

The pizza arrived and they picked at their pieces silently as the Bears were getting their butts kicked by the Indianapolis Colts. Susan opened a bear and it hissed, she sighed, crossing her ankles and then uncrossing them, "Okay, this is ridiculous."

"No joke." Mark said and rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

"I'm just moving." Susan told him.

"Yeah. Just a few thousand miles." He said, it came out more bitterly than he had intended.

"I'll still see you, when I come visit my parents or at conferences."

"Right and we'll call."

"And trade Christmas Cards."

"And pictures of Susie and Rachel."

"Definitely. Nothing will change." Susan forced herself to believe it.

"Bull shit."

"Thank-you for saying it first." Susan told him.

"Susan." Mark turned to face her, "I'm gonna miss you and traumas are gonna suck without your smiling face at the end of them, but if your heart is telling you to go to Phoenix, then you need to."

"Yeah." Susan nodded her head in agreement, "I need to. I have to do this, Mark."

"Then it's settled and we'll just adjust." Mark told her, squeezing her arm.

"Ugh. We're sucking tonight." Susan flicked off the TV and they sat in the dark.

"Should I go?" Mark asked, everything felt awkward. How could one sentence change everything so drastically?"

"No." Susan leaned against him and he wrapped an arm around her, "Stay, please?"

"You got it." Mark kissed the top of her head.

"You know, for the first few weeks after Susie left, I would wake up and think I'd hear her crying and I run out here to emptiness." Susan swiped at her tears, "I'd go to the store and feel the urge to buy diapers."

"Susan.." Mark said softly, his fingers playing with the ends of her hair.

"Or I'd want to go up to day care after a bad day at work and see her smiling face. I'd fall apart from wanting to hold her so bad." Susan leaned her head on his shoulder and her tears dampened his shirt, "It was like a piece of me was missing."

"I know." Mark whispered and he did. Her hand found his in the dark and she played with his fingers as she cried, "You're gonna be okay."

"I hate waiting for Chloe to screw up, I hate that Susie is my daughter in every sense of the word, but Chloe gets to tuck her into bed at night because of biology." Susan sobbed and Mark pulled her into his arms.

"I know." Mark kissed her forehead, rocking her back and forth, "It will get better."

"It won't be better till I am in Phoenix, holding that little girl." Susan buried her head into his chest as she cried harder. Her tears felt like bullets on Mark's chest. She had to leave and he understood that, but why'd she have to leave him?

**A/N: Okay, so that was short. The next few chapters are gonna be angsty and probably short, but it will end on a happy note because it circles back around to Those Nights. So hang in there people. Chloe is gonna mess up and Elizabeth isn't gonna exist. Because Marsan is love. Next Chapter: 'Say Goodbye'**


	3. Say Goodbye

**Say Goodbye**

**Summary: Even though you're leaving, our feelings would always stay the same, I wish we could be laughing, instead I'm standing here asking, do we have to end this now, could we make it last somehow? **

**A/N: I love writing this story. It's keeping my mind off things. **

**Dedication: Rach. Beef-ef**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Zoom in on my empty wallet**

"Sir..." The man shook his shoulder, "Sir.."

"Huh?" Mark turned around, he felt numb.

"Sir, we need to clear the tracks for the next train." The man told him.

"Oh. Okay." Mark said, his feet felt like lead as he walked slowly out of Union Station. He had ran across Chicago to catch her, his chest should have felt lighter, more open but he felt like he was going to pass out. He hailed a cab and rattled off her address, correction, it was his address now.

When the cab pulled to a stop, he didn't feel like going inside, to be overwhelmed with her scent; it filled every corner of that apartment and right now, there was a good chance it'd kill him. He walked down the street to the park, the park they had gone to when she decided to keep Little Susie. Mark fell onto the swing, the same one Susan had sat on while he held the baby. He rocked back and forth on his shoes, his head staring down at the gravel. How was he supposed to live when there was a memory of her on every corner?

He needed to forget, getting out of the swing, he began to walk. Mark was angry, bitter, hurt. _How could she leave him? How could she leave her life? Her family? _But then he felt guilty, she had Little Susie to think of and he could never begrudge her happiness, what other choice did he have?

He wanted to get drunk, he wanted to get so plastered he couldn't think straight -let alone feel the gaping hole in his heart. So he walked to the corner bar and ordered a shot of whiskey, bringing it to his lip, he swallowed it quick. The alcohol burnt his throat and reminded him that what he was feeling was real.

The bartender cut him off after a few too many and asked if there was anyone he could call. Without thinking, he rambled off Doug's number, "Okay Buddy, your friend is on his way."

"Mark?" Doug came over to him.

"Doug. I want to drink." Mark said as Doug hooked Mark's arm around his neck and hoisted him off the stool.

"I know you do Mark, but right now we gotta get you hope and some aspirin in you." Doug said, paying the bartender.

"She got on the train." Mark said softly.

"I figured." Doug said, helping him out in the cool night air.

"Why am I not mad?" Mark asked as he stumbled down the street.

"You're hurt Mark. And about ten sheets to the wind." Doug told him, "You smell like a brewry."

"I wanted to forget." He mumbled.

"Did it work?" Doug asked.

"No." Mark sighed, "I'm gonna puke."

"Okay." Doug lead him over to the trashcan. Mark leaned over and puked up the alcohol, Doug rubbed his back, "Deep breaths."

"It hurts." Mark said as he threw up some more.

"Well, it's going to." Doug sighed, "You got your heart ripped out, Bud."

"I got it ripped out and thrown under a damn train." Mark wiped his mouth on the back of his sleeve, "-I'm ready to walk. I got my heart thrown under the train and she doesn't care."

"Mark, She cares. She's doing what she has to do." Doug helped him into the apartment building and up the stairs.

"I wanted to throw myself under those tracks." Mark mumbled.

"I'm sure you did." Doug tried to be sympathetic, "Can you change on your own?"

"I don't wanna." Mark protested.

"Okay." Doug helped him lay down on the couch, removing his shoes for him, "I'm gonna get you some tylenol and water, okay?"

"Okay." Mark mumbled, turning on his side, "Waste basket too."

"A wastebasket too." Doug nodded, keeping an eye on his friend. Even when Jennifer had left him, he'd never seen him so torn apart. He'd really lost his best friend.

**A/N: Okay, so I thought that was a nice little role reversal. and wow, I've never wrote so much in a 24 hour period. 2 updates on this fic and another new one. I do believe this is called a roll ladies and gents. Reviews would be appreciated. **


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